Trust

Trust is sometimes a dirty little five letter word.  It is defined in Webster as a “firm belief or confidence in the honesty integrity, reliability, justice, etc. of another person or thing; faith; hope.”  Wow, what a mouthful!

To trust means to allow oneself to be vulnerable to a person or thing.  It is putting your hope and faith in a person believing that they will deliver or believing to receive the expected outcome.  How many of us have been burned by this five letter word, therefore resulting in what we call “trust issues?”

From a personal standpoint, I have had to face my issues with trusting.  If you are like me, you want to be able to trust and take others at their word believing for the expected outcome.  When you have been let down or your trust has been betrayed on several occasions, trust becomes a major challenge.  After betrayal of trust how can one get over trust issues?   Truly, there is no easy way to get over trust issues or challenges.  There is no quick fix, step by step magic formula that works for everyone.  Let’s explore one major word that is at the heart of trust issues, vulnerability.

Trusting means you will have to allow yourself to be vulnerable to someone or something at some point in your life.  In saying this let’s note that there are ways to be vulnerable and still maintain control.  This doesn’t mean that you can avoid all hurt.  When you walk into a vulnerable situation you have to understand that there is potential for let down and you prepare yourself for both the good and the bad.  Yes, I am trusting I will receive the expected outcome, but if I don’t, where do I go from here.  It is knowing that that things may change and what is my plan if I don’t receive that expected outcome.

One final note I want to make with regard to trust is the need for forgiveness. To help overcome trust issues and the hurt that results from broken trust is one’s ability to forgive. Our ability to trust must be married to our ability to forgive. Forgiving someone after they have broken your trust is easier said than done, however, if we do not forgive we have the potential to become bitter and bitterness can lead to physical ailments as well as emotional distress. We must learn how to trust and forgive. It is the key to long lasting and healthy relationships.

Learning to trust builds character and strength; allowing oneself to be vulnerable has its ups and downs; knowing you can move forward no matter the outcome is giving stability to an unknown future.

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About the Author: Kenya Johnson, M.P.G.C., is owner of The Total Makeover Company, LLC, working to help enhance your personal growth. You can contact the author through our corporate email: rhema-int@shaw.ca. Visit The Total Makeover, LLC, on the web at www.thetotalmakeover.com.